DEREK 360: Popeye is gonna die.

E. coli is back at it. Back at its unawesome game of killing people and making people ridiculously sick. This time the food blamed for the spread of Mr. Coli is spinach (hence the Popeye title...haha...right?...shit). So far there has only been one death, which happened in Wisconsin, but 50 others have reported sickness in seven other states. The scariest part is that all the states are not even bordering Wisconsin. New Mexico, Idaho, Connecticut, Utah, Michigan, Oregon, Indiana. This shit is all over the map.


The tainted spinach (or "nasty greens" as I prefer to call them) can't be traced back to one source so all spinach could be at risk of a visit from the Coli. The nasty greens are mostly being found in those nifty bags of spinach you see at the grocery store, but they could be present in restaurant cooking or anywhere else spinach is used.

Just to freak you all out a little more, here is a brief description (which I completely plagiarized from the yahoo story) of what E. coli can do to the body:

E. coli causes diarrhea, often with bloody stools. Most healthy adults can recover completely within a week, although some people -- including the very young and old -- can develop a form of kidney failure that often leads to death.

Bloody stools?
Kidney Failure?
Death?
OH FUCK!

Bottom line: Beware Spinach.
-Derek

P.S. It is a lesser known fact that most spinach prefer to wear Converse sneakers, as the art shows. Just FYI.