Happy Valentine's Day from the JUhS

Feel free to scribble these greetings down onto a card and give to your special love muffin (For a nominal fee)
NOTE - The box your condoms come in with some work from some watercolors make great cards

Your love is like shoelaces...it keeps my shoes on my feet but still can trip me up

Your love is like Oscar the Grouch. Green, lives in a trashcan and bad tempered.
or
Your love is like a trashcan. Full of rotten bananas and Oscar the Grouch.

To you, my Katrina Survivor Lover,
Please. Don’t let the hurricane be the only thing that blows me this year. Meet me in the Super Dome. You wear those waders I love so much and I’ll bring the chocolates and TV I stole.

My Cowboy Lover. You be Heath. I’ll be Jake. Hope we don’t get AIDS. Don’t tell my wife.

Your love is like colored socks. Awesome and trendy.

My lady with a heart the color of a ruby. Your love is like menthol cigarettes, primarily consumed by black people.

Katie -
My alien loins are swollen for you. I promise NOT to shoplift the pootie.

-Tom

My Patriotic Love. Your heart is like Dick Cheney’s…which makes me worried. DON’T SHOOT! HAHA!

My Human Lady Lover,

Your love is more refreshing and fulfilling than my pet sheep and you kiss better than my sister. Thank you for not judging. Happy Heart Love Day!

-Jade

Sweet pretty lady. Roses are red. Violets are blue. Tookie is dead, soon you will be too. (Why’d you leave me?)

My whole bodied woman: roses are red, violets are blue. Terri Schiavo was a hot piece. But, not as hot as you.

My E-Harmony Hottie,
I’m tired of banging my keyboard late into the night. Come join me and let me bang something else.

Like your head with this hammer.

Love,
ThunderKisses221
(22 M, 5’9”/200/Green/Black)

You are easily my chocha of the year. Let’s make mean consensual, adult sex.

Sweet Princess Face: my love for you is like “Arrested Development” genius and cancelled.

My Romantic, Saucy Terrorist Lady: Put your veil back on, I’m having trouble concentrating.

Mi Senorita de Juarez, Mexico: Your love lifts me high off the ground! But, disrespect me again and you’ll be in it with your sisters.

My wife Janet -
Your stripes are black. Your stripes are white. Bet with my money again and you’ll be dead by that night.

Love and slapshots,
Wayne G. (The Great One…and don’t you forget it)

My Laci Valentine -
Let’s go fishing!

Your husband,
Scott

p.s. - Is your will in order?

My Sexy Maurice Clarett -
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Let’s make out and let me rob people with you.

I’m CraZY,
Barret Robbins

Dearest Sweets,
Your face is beautiful. With you, love I am in. Now take off your pants. Let's make dirty sin.

Hi My Temptress,
The sun is rising. My wife is in traction. Soon she will be gone. Now, give me some adulterous action.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!
-Cupid