For Your Consideration...

Juhsoldiers,

In light of the recent uptrend in global stingray attacks per capita, coupled with the attention gravitating towards the southern African nation of Namibia (due mostly to the Pitt-Jolie offspring -- aka Genesis -- and Snipes' tax evasion, or "filming"), I have reached a startling conclusion. I suggest to all of you that I have, through induction, found where Big Pooga resides; the very location of his headquarters for world domination.

We need look no farther than Namibia itself. I present to you the following exhibits:

Exhibit A

Exhibit B


There you have it. Namibia is clearly shaped like a stingray, Big Pooga's assassin of choice. Coincidence? I think not.

What does this confounding revelation tell us? What should our next course of action be? I don't have the answer folks. But as our good friends in Metallica tell us, "fight fire with fire." And the only way I know to fight the whip of a stingray tail is with the whip of, well ... a whip. You all know what this means.

I beseech you ... help us Whipmaster Charlie. You're our only hope.

Stay the course,
Andrew (juhs)